Development 3 - 5 Years

Child Development 3 - 5 Years

Each child is different from every other child. Each child moves at their own pace, usually through the same stages or milestones and in the same order. Children grow and learn continually, but not in a smooth flowing pattern. Sometimes they practice skills for quite a while and seem as if they will never move on. Other times they learn many skills very quickly.

Understanding your child’s developing abilities and what they can and cannot do at each age will help you to:
   • keep your child safe
   • help your child develop
   • understand your child’s behaviour
   • gain satisfaction and enjoyment from the important role of caring for your child

Growth and development

Between three and five years, children’s confidence grows as they start to explore and look for answers and reasons for everything in their world. They love being praised for trying and like to try everything themselves.

Both three and four year olds are likely to be very active because they are trying to develop their running, climbing and balancing skills. They need plenty of time outdoors to be able to do this.

Three-year-olds are most likely to be able to:

   • pedal and steer tricycles, turning corners easily
   • climb play equipment easily
   • cut with scissors
   • use a fork and spoon
   • wash their hands with supervision
   • pull their pants up and down

By four years, many children will:

• climb ladders, trees and any other interesting objects
• draw, paint and build things, showing great pride in their creations. Displaying these creations (e.g. on the kitchen fridge) encourages their efforts as well as their development.

Although many children of four are experts at climbing they will generally only attempt things that they can manage safely. They still need supervision however, as they sometimes can climb up an object, but may not be able to get down without help.

Language

The three-year-old is starting to enjoy conversations with adults as their language skills develop. They love to help and will discuss all sorts of things while helping. You can help them develop their language skills by:

   • talking to them about what they are doing
   • listening to them when they want to tell you about something.
   • answering their ‘endless’ questions, but also allowing yourself and the family some quiet time.
   • reading books to them and encouraging them to ‘read’ too. Joining the local library is a good way to provide a wide variety of books for your child

Your child and other people

As the three year old learns more language skills, they are keen to find out everything about their world, and show more interest in other people.

At this age, children usually:

   • show some sympathy towards others
   • show affection towards younger children
   • want to please you
   • take turns with others from time to time
   • begin to notice sex differences and ask about different body parts

Along with this new maturity, they can also show some of their insecurity at this age.
They may:

   • whinge, demand and blame others for anything that goes wrong
   • be afraid of the dark, wild animals, or noisy machinery
   • overreact to the slightest injury
   • change from being shy one day to show-off the next day
   • have their feelings hurt very easily

They may also be nail biting, masturbating, blinking excessively, stuttering or thumb sucking. These are common signs of this age, but as they grow and develop these will all pass, if you are patient and do not make a fuss about them. Excessive amounts of this behaviour can sometimes be a problem. If this is so, talk to your child health nurse or doctor about your child’s behaviour.

Four-year-olds now want to know why, when and how about everything. They are trying to learn about their world and how it works.
They:

   • are enjoying conversations with others more and more
   • will often help with jobs
   • will sometimes refuse to do as they are asked. This is their developing independence showing through
   • understand about taking turns
   • accept the need for rules and fair play

Learning through play

Children learn about their world through play. They experiment with all sorts of situations and objects so that they learn how the world works.

Between three and five years, children have lots of fun with make-believe play and imitating play. They act out roles of all sorts of characters (e.g. firemen, policemen, teachers, mothers and fathers) which is great practice for later life. At this age other children can help share these games as they all take roles. Even parents can play minor roles (e.g. being a customer, helper, or just finding play materials).

At this age, children love to help with households jobs. These jobs can be turned into house play. Children can
assist with

   • unpacking groceries
   • washing, drying and putting away dishes
   • preparing vegetables
   • making cakes and biscuits
   • sweeping and dusting

Safety

Although children of this age are improving their skills every day, they still need supervision to stay safe. They need the opportunity to practice their skills, but to do so safely. It is not possible to supervise your child every minute of the day, so you will need to teach your child about safety as they are developing.

Children learn best by copying what they see others do. If you follow these steps you will know when your child can manage safely alone. It is a good idea to explain to them:

   1. what you are doing
   2. why you are doing it in a particular way then
   3. allow them to practice it while you supervise

To help keep your child safe

   • always supervise play in and around water
   • supervise play in parks and playgrounds and teach your child how to safely use playground equipment
   • take your child across streets and teach them safe behaviour in traffic
   • teach your child to use tools and kitchen equipment safely
   • keep dangerous items (e.g. matches, cigarette lighters) out of your child’s reach
   • talk to your child about ‘stranger danger’
   • always use approved restraints in a car

For more information

If you would like more information about your child’s development or you are worried about your child, talk to your child health nurse or doctor.

You could also ask at your local library for books on this topic.